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my Turkish boyfriend is married and he wants me to wait for his divorce

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we met in dating app, after several dates as boyfriend and girlfriend, he told me he's married. he is planning a divorce with his wife but he is still waiting for the right time to. He said he's not happy with her but he doesnt want to hurt anyone so he needs to wait for a right timing. He wants to report to his family face to face before taking action. He is going back in 3 months time. He said his wife is not willing to be a muslim but when he asked me i said i dont have religion i can follow him to be muslim. I quitted eating pork after 3 weeks dating upon his request. He is very happy about it. I struggled to continue or not, he said he loves me and hope i can wait, we will build up a happy future life together. I agree to set time frame. 

he gets mad easily, he does not trust me .He always make video calls to check where am i and who with me. Sometimes when i was busy and didnt reply to his message immediately, he will be mad. His English is not very good but we do communicate in english, sometimes when i use uncommon words or phrase, he doesn't understand. I try to use simple english communicating with him. He always feel insecured with me, seems he thinks im attractive to all men, he blocks my connection with other guys and i agree, because he's so unique and important, i can give up anyone for him. He found out some weird messages with another man, I apologized and blocked everyone in front of him, but the trust problem happened before this incident. But every time we argue, he raised this issue. Do you guys think he can really overcome this issue? he claimed he will overcome it someday, he needs time. I feel this incident holding him back from going all in...i know it's my fault so i give him time and try to be submissive girlfriend that he wants. Will turkish men build up trust again after this kind of incident? i asked why is he still staying, he said he loves me he doesnt want to lose me so he chooses to stay.

He always make different requests, whenever i cannot satisfy him, he gets mad and thinks i ignore him. he's kind of person like "if you love me you will do this for me" . he's childish and loves to disappear whenever hes not happy with me but then he claimed his phone was out of battery or just sleeping instead of admitting he's not happy with me and then ignore my messages. I live alone, he always comes up to do cooking and cleaning up for me, i appreciate that he cares so much about me.

he spends a lot of time with me, i can feel he's hiding something but i know i can never figure out what hes trying to hide from me. Shall i trust him and wait for him? im very happy to be with him and terrify to lose him. but everything is happening too fast and seems so unrealistic

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Hi Crystal, welcome to Turkey Central.

If you read more of the topics in the Turkish Dating and Romantic Relationships forum you will find that over the years we have had a lot of posts asking this kind of question. In reality there are some Turkish men who have married women of other nationalities and some of the marriages work out very well. Unfortunately there are also a lot that don't work out. A lot of Turkish men are domineering and controlling and act like your boyfriend, There is a big problem with the way women are treated in Turkey and it is unlikely that he will change, you will either have to submit to his demands and attitude or find somebody else. It doesn't sound to me as if he really will get a divorce. His demands are only likely to get worse and if he really does get a divorce and you marry him I think you will end up being desperately unhappy. I'm sorry that my answer is so negative but from what you say about him it sounds as though you are already unhappy with him, there are a lot of nice men in the world, why not find one who will suit you better.

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Hi Crystal, welcome.

Reading your post left me very concerned at your situation.  Your description of your boyfriend's behaviour shows up so many red flags, if I was in your shoes I would never marry him but run away as far as possible.  He sounds very controlling, he would never change & you would never be happy.  If you have not yet met his family you have no way of knowing the truth about his background. 

Sorry my thoughts may not be to your liking, but there's no way to whitewash someone like that.  In the end the decision is yours to make, & I wish you well..... 

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