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Talked Online...Mistake?

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So before I get started, a little background on myself. I am a college-age girl who goes to university in the U.

S. This Turkish guy friended me on facebook a while back and wanted to talk and be friends. We talked a little, but then I un-friended him because I though it was a little sketchy. A couple weeks after that, he friended me again and I accepted which I now regret. Slowly we began to talk more and more, and I began to fall for him. A lot. He was a sweet talker and was pretty handsome. I video chatted with him a couple times, but never for long. Then he started badgering me with questions about marriage. Those questions threw me off guard, and that is when I then, again, became dubious about his motives. After discussing marriage for about 3 or 4 days, I just recently, about a day ago, blocked him on Facebook. I know he is probably angry with me but I didn't want it to go any further, and was starting to feel a little uncomfortable. I got on my friend's facebook just to glance at his profile, and he has posted some "dark" stuff. Now, I don't know hardly ANY Turkish but when I put it into a translator, I didn't like what I saw. I just hope that this is over, and him being angry isn't going to jeopardize my safety here in the U.

S. Am I just over-analyzing everything? Or should I be a little worried? Probably not a good idea to have talked to him at all...

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First of all welcome to this community.

Why you should be worried ? Sometimes Turkish mans overreacting this kind of stuff ( I'm Turkish and male) i know it from my close friends and environment. He will probably drink at most one week and you will be forgetten. I'm not a type of person who gives you advice for relationship thing but what worst he could be done to you via internet ?

As i understand, talking about marrige is to soon and it is sound skeptical of course or maybe he is looking for a U.

S citizen for marriage to go over there. I think nothing else but those two.

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Greenstein is right. I wouldn't worry about your safety at all. Some Turkish men (and also those from other countries) try to befriend foreign women and romance them over the internet. Sometimes it's legitimate, often it leads to trying to get the woman to fall in love with them (they may be doing this with multiple women at the same time), then some "emergency" happens where they need money (like an accident, mother needs an operation, etc), and they want the foreign woman to send them money. I don't know if this is the case here, but you are smart to be skeptical. The chances of him being able to do anything bad to you in the US, from here in Turkey, are zero. So rest easy, put it behind you and move on with your life.

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Sorry but 98 percent of mens allways make trouble!!

ken and greenstein are right..

What can he able to do with you!!?nothing at all!

So don't worry ..but remember this experience for your future ..being friend in net and fall in love in this virtual environment is FALSE..so be carefull

you don't know who's his parents..who is he exactly..these kind of connection aren't safe at all

actually in the real world and around yourself you'll be find a person who will loves you honestly ..you don't need to this kind of loves!that's it ..all of them are just a lie..

now just smile and back to your life and be happY honey :)

 

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  • 1 month later...
  • 2 months later...

Hi Sarahsmith, welcome to Turkey Central. If you read some of the other, older, posts in this Turkish Dating and Romantic Relationships forum you will see that there are a lot of foreigners who have had similar problems. It is by no means restricted to Turkey, it happens all over the world but you are now one of the statistics.  My advice is to forget him and move on, don't waste your life trying to follow a dream that has turned into a nightmare.

 

Çukurbağlı's blog. Warning - takes you off the forum and into the www.wilderness

 

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Hi, I have not checked the our romance pages in here and therefore I have probably missed many dramas with unhappy ending but in my opinion it just seems unfair to criticize all men from Turkey with prejudice and say all their intention is to move abroad but nothing else.

Well, this might be true story which has happened at %99 of the cases. But you never know that this %1 little tiny exception might chance your world and you can never realize that you have missed the chance of meeting your soulmate or life partner ever.

I believe that life is full of miracles and we have been reading/watching news, people one from Japan other all the way from US, get together and coupled and there are many other examples of this happening everyday.

For this reason, I personally do not underestimate OR critizise this gentleman from Mardin, cuz my philosophy do not let me to accept any kind of prejudice over the people and put them in the majority group of %99 before knowing them very well.

Plus, since when speaking of marriage make the women feel insecure? This is such a naive and blameless topic which two adults can freely discuss over it. There is nothing wrong with that. Timing of speaking could be perceived early for one side, but it doesn't make the other dishonest or unreliable.     

Long story short, I believe in love no matter what cuz love is the most powerful thing in the world.

Cheers,    

H. Ender KELEŞ | Founding Partner
Avukat / Attorney at Law, LL.M.
T : +90 532 179 1513  |  F : +90 232 486 10 17
E : [email protected]  |  www.eglegal.net
Manas Bulvarı No:74, Trend Office, K:1 D:3 Bayraklı/Izmir- Turkey

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You're right Eglegal. There are plenty of cases where foreign women marry Turkish men and have very happy lives. I guess it's like the newspapers, they don't report on the thousands of airplanes which take off and land safely every day, they only report on the accidents! So also in the case of Turkish-foreign relationships, especially in forums, we hear more about they few bad cases than the many good cases. Thanks for setting that straight.

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