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Children in Turkish Restaurants

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Hello,

Firstly   hos_geldiniz.gif

Turks in general love children - dont be surprised at the attention they recieve - it is quite common for cheeks to be pinched (gently) or head touched. In European countries, UK in particular, it might be considered molestation and parents would be concerned - not so in Turkey.

In answer to your question - it is perfectly acceptable for children to go to restaurants - I have an 8 year old and he often accompanies us to restaurants.

In Turkey the family culture is strong.

GDB

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On 4/16/2015 at 8:39 PM, clinky said:

If your child cries expect him to be whisked away and doted on by the waiting staff.

True, and this can be a good thing, if they have time and the place is not busy, BUT, this not happen always, especially in tourist areas.

On 4/17/2015 at 8:51 AM, IbrahimAbi said:

Unfortunately GDB is correct. If anyone can come up with a child0free restaurant in our area we'd be regular customers.

I used to say that a crying child in a restaurant was a good reason for mandatory birth control! :ranting: 

I then had a child! :wub:

However I still refused to foist her upon a public place.  :huh: 

We did not go out much in her first year or so until she was relatively well-behaved, before that, if she got tired, cranky and started to cry, I would pick her up and leave. More than once I left a meal on the plate rather than disturb diners. It was also for my own peace of mind, after all, how can a parent, in good conscience, stay in a decent restaurant when their child is ill-mannered and/or crying? In Turkey, parents frequently let their toddlers and older children run far more loose than I like. :angry:   If that happens I either shush the child, ask the parents to keep the child contained (always without luck as they think I am a "canavar" (monster),  :confused: 

I have also complained to the management (never with success), failing all esle I will leave the place. :kicking:

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This is an example of the culture clash...

 

In short, kids are everywhere.  I was amazed how we'd go to the café in the park in the summers and 3 year olds would still be running around after midnight!

The Missus is Turkish, she feels the same as do I. Get the kids under control in public places. She has stopped them and admonished them and sent them back to the parents.

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The Missus is Turkish, she feels the same as do I. Get the kids under control in public places. She has stopped them and admonished them and sent them back to the parents.

Rather inconsiderate don't you think - a majority of accomodation thst kids live in are flats/apartments, so when they have space to run they play and the play becomes noisy and boisterous.

If my son was admonished by someone who objected to him playing in a park, I would take issue with that and suggest the person complaining go elsewhere - politely or maybe not so politely depending .....

A park is for kids to enjoy themselves and an old adage comes to mind ' if you cannot stand the heat - get out of the kitchen'

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Kids need to be able to enjoy themselves without inconveniencing others. They need to learn that they must be considerate to others and that they are not the most important creatures around. This is the main reason that kids should be brought up with animals, to learn that they must be considerate to others too.

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On 4/29/2015 at 11:44 AM, GDB said:

Rather inconsiderate don't you think - a majority of accomodation thst kids live in are flats/apartments, so when they have space to run they play and the play becomes noisy and boisterous.

If my son was admonished by someone who objected to him playing in a park, I would take issue with that and suggest the person complaining go elsewhere - politely or maybe not so politely depending .....

A park is for kids to enjoy themselves and an old adage comes to mind ' if you cannot stand the heat - get out of the kitchen'

The title of the OP is "Children in Turkish Restaurants" not a park. With many places to play in a park, a certain respect for the others and especially the elders who come to enjoy a park should not be much to expect. The public parks are not just for "noisy and boisterous" children. I believe it is inconsiderate when you, as a parent, are not considerate of the others who come to enjoy the park. Create a balance, a nice yin and yang.

Are you Turkish? If so, are you "old Turkish" or "new Turkish"?  The Missus is a mix of both with a lean toward the older side. During my 15 years here I have seen the rise of the "new" and I am unsure I like it, too many görgüsüz nouveau riche or recently arrived middle class who have forgotten the good manners their village or family elders taught them and who fail to impress upon their children that these are important. It was quite common not very long ago that an elder stranger would admonish an unbehaving child and, in effect, be admonishing the parent for not properly supervising the child.  Giving up a set on a bus, tram or ferry was common when I first arrived, downturned eyes ignoring the elderly or inform were more common when I left Istanbul.

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@Kas (sorry, no Turkish keyboard)-

I HATE the attitude of "stay out of my business" when it comes to kids these days. 

I am in the States and am NOT that old and I think it SHOULD be the business of ANY adult to step in when kids are concerned.  But this whole, "don't talk to my kid" thing is largely what's wrong with society today.

I think kids should be kids, as long as they don't interfere with other's right to enjoy themselves.  And of course, safety.

Kids running around in a park?  Go for it.  Open space and grass.  Kids running around in a restaurant?  NO!  Hot food... need I say more?

I also HATE screaming.  That should be saved for physical pain and abductions.  NOT for playing.  Yelling when role playing in the park?  As long as a person trying to read isn't bothered...

My DH and I share a common porch area with the neighbors.  The entire neighborhood's kids play on OUR porch.  My DH wants to shoo them off.  I say that's a bit not nice....  But the fist curse or inappropriate discussion I hear, and I'll say, "You want to talk like that??? Do it on your own house so YOUR parents can hear it!"  And if it keeps going on, I'd be fine walking over to their parents and telling them what their kid's doing.  As long as I'm not nasty about it, I shouldn't have to worry about retribution...

It's all a balancing act.

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