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Relationship Advice... please give your views

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Ok so here goes nothing, im trying to get as many opinions as possible to help me make a decision, i know at the end of the day it's up to me.

So in July i went on holiday to turkey and believe all the stereotypical talk that all the turkish are after visa's etc and i did see a lot that with some of the men. I never thought anything of it and just continued to be myself as you do on holiday. I added them all on facebook and would talk to them occasionally, especially one of them.

I started of talking to him as i would anyone else but it slowly turned into flirting. I found myself smiling everytime i saw i had a message from him. and before you say 'Oh wise up he's turkish he's only after one thing', thats what i thought to but i just saw it as some harmless flirting with someone i'd never see again

Again things slowly progressed and i found myself sexting him (no pictures - i wouldn't do that) and i guess what i'm saying i found myself falling for him. But here's the thing at first he asked me to come visit him in october when we first started chatting, and in my head i just though oh yeah think im gonna over in october at the end of hotel season for his entertainment. I know this is bad but i lead him to believe i would come over if my mum would let me.

But anyway we continued to talk and i could tell you nearly everything there is to know about him. and then one night i got extremely drunk and snogged this guy and someone put a picture on facebook and i woke up to the message of 'nice picture' and he stopped talking to me. When i continually apologized until he admitted he was hurt as he thought we really liked each other....

He knows i am a virgin and told me that he would like to be my first and maybe my last. He's so sweet and my best friend also thinks he is genuine. I also know that he has had an english girlfriend before which lasted for 3 years...

We have been messaging nearly everyday and he has asked to do skype so we can talk, and that is all i will do! but to be honest i find myself falling for him and i think he is genuine, he wants me to come in feburary to see him over his birthday and while he is in his hometown...

My only worry is that if i go over in feburary is that he'll be expecting certain things which makes me nervous......

please give me your thoughts Posted Image

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Well you did ask for our thoughts. You are heading for a big fall if you don't drop this now.


Çukurbağlı's blog. Warning - takes you off the forum and into the www.wilderness


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I have expierenced something so similar, and it has all turned out to be fine so far :) I went on holiday to turkey in august and became smitten around one guy and he took me out to centrum and told me all about his life and was so open with my parents also and cared massively what they thought.

When I left we spoke every single day, he even left work early and didn't stay like other workers to be with other guests. I may sound in denial but theres ways I know this is all true and he hasn't been the same with other guests before. Last week I flew out there and stayed with him and his family, he said it was a big thing to take me to his family. They couldn't do enough for me and he is so truly genuine - so not all turkish guys are the same. His also had a longterm girlfriend from Denmark. I hope you are as lucky as me!!! :)

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  • 2 weeks later...

Before you get more involved with him I suggest you do some research about what it would be like in the future if you go forward. I'm married to a Turk and believe me, it can make it more difficult being married to one rather than someone from your own culture. Already he had got you apologising because HE was jealous, just because you 'snogged' some other guy.

You will have to cope with decisions about where to live. You sound very young so perhaps you are still in education, which you shouldn't give up because if you ever want to get him a visa you will need a job that pays good money and if you live in Turkey a good education will also help you.

Wherever you live, one of you will be missing their family which becomes even more difficult if you have children. One lot of grandparents will not see much of their grandchildren.

Take a good look at these forums :-  http://www.turkeycentral.com/forum/133-romantic-relationships/


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