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I have a bit of a strange situation. I've been doing a lot of reading but there is just so complication information out there that I feel I just need some direct advice after explaining my situation. I'm a 22 year old UK citizen. I'm currently unemployed though I am actively looking for full time work. I currently have around £5000 in savings. I was in a relationship with a Turkish girl for almost a year but because neither of us were in a position to travel and see each other things eventually got strained and we reluctantly decided to break up. Not long ago we got back in touch and have been talking a lot. It feels to both of us like we never even broke up. Our situations have changed and I plan on going to visit her on a 1 week holiday to turkey in June provided she is okay with it, I didn't actually ask her yet. I want to be with this girl more than anything and I don't want the complications that screwed us over last time to happen again. I see this as a second chance and I'm not willing to let it slip by. I'm fully committed to finding a way to be with her. I'm also fully aware that getting her to the UK would be next to impossible, but me going to Turkey and potentially living there permanently is something I would absolutely be willing to do, though I have no idea what the requirements would be or how I would work. For now my question is this. Right now she is working, her contract will end soon and she is currently living with her parents and has been using the opportunity to save as much money as possible. She really wants to get her own place though as she doesn't have a good relationship with her parents. I believe I read that on a tourist visa I could stay in Turkey up to 90 days. My question is would I be able to use a tourist visa to go over there for a few months and live with her if she got her own place, ideally helping support her financially through savings as well. And I suppose a follow up question would be how would I go about spending longer and longer periods there? Of course I plan on having worked for a while in the UK before really going for this. I need to be with this girl. If any of you have any experiences which could help me get from where I am now to seeing her frequently I would be very grateful.

Hello everyone! I have just joined the forum and am so glad to have found a place where I can seek advice about my situation. I am an 18 year old girl living in Ireland. I met this turkish guy at the restaurant I started working at 8 months ago and have liked him from the start. He is 27 and has been living here for 3 years now. It was very obvious to me that we both had a connection from the start but neither of us worked up the guts to address the issue. We've always flirted..but in the last few months it's become so much more then that. Last week we finally talked about it and told each other how we feel. I can't quite say that we are in love yet,but it's definitely heading down that road. When he found out I felt the same way, he was left reeling. Bottom line is we both want to be together, but my parents are very religious and traditional people and there would be talk of disowning me from the family if we got together,I'm certain. This guy.. He is like no one else I've met before. He doesn't overdo the charming thing like I've read many turkish man do...and he doesn't get touchy feel too often. But when he does,it melts my heart. He said he's been waiting for someone like me for years and he's finally found me. Anyhow,seeing as I'm only 18 and still living with parents , I suggested that we wait a year as friends to figure out if what we are feeling is true or not,and for me to be a bit older. If we still long for each other by the end of the year, I am willing to fight for it and give it a proper shot. I can't help but feel this tiny seed of doubt in the back of my mind that he is too good to be true and that there has to be a catch. He was born muslim but isn't awfully interested in the whole "religious" aspect of things. I would really appreciate any advice or opinions that people would have..it'd be a great help.

Selam Arkadaslar! I am really thankful that I found this site! I am Jane and I am from the Philippines. I met my turkish boyfriend through online dating site. We've been together for more than a year now and I love him so much. We've been through a lot problems but we still managed to be together and keep our relationship strong. For the past months I am having a hard time trusting my boyfriend. He cheated on me by having online girlfriends and now I feel that something is wrong again. Anyway my question is my boyfriend ask me to delete or hide my cover photo on Facebook (photo is a collage of picture of him and me together) because he said his sister will get angry at him if she sees it. He said that it is disrespectful for his family and friends if they see and found out that we are officially together without me meeting his family first. I just want to understand is this is true? Is it forbidden for him to acknowledge me or make our relationship known to his family and friends if I haven't met his family? I would really appreciate your help. Thank you in advance.

I'm not sure how to start these things at all but I'll try and sum everything up so I'm not boring yous lol in August of this year I went to Marmaris and stayed at the same hotel i stayed at two years previous. I went with my parents as my 18th birthday present and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I mingled with a lot of people from different parts of England (I am scottish and never really met anyone from outside of Scotland apart from foreign countries). I stay in contact with them all now it was just great! anyways, so when I went to Turkey I had no intentions of romances or anything like that, just a relaxing holiday away from my home and work! I added a lot of the newer staff on facebook on the Sunday night after my birthday (first week almost over) and on the Monday night my - now boyfriend- added me too. we started chatting over facebook whilst he worked during the day and night in the hotel. we really hit it off and he was always waiting our tables and he knew I wasn't willing to tell my parents right away because I wasn't sure how they would react. we would speak all day and exchange glances. I would be lying by the pool looking absolutely awful after having no make up on, wet hair and braces (yeah not confident about those haha) and he would always come out of the bar to be able to smile at me. any chance he got, he would walk past and touch my arm or just smile and say hiya. he begged to meet up outside of the hotel and I was really reluctant due to stories and the old tales I've heard about Turkish guys. that's when I told my parents that I did quite fancy him and would want to go and hang out with him. so on his night off we went out to a local bar and I did pay just for the drinks, which he was very very unhappy about (it was supposed to be the park we met but I took him to a bar beside it - just for my own reassurance). however, he's not the best English but we got on really well, we laughed and smile the whole night and I just had butterflies. like hardcore butterflies! I left a week after we started speaking we still message everyday and webcam as much as we can and its going great. I speak to one of his best friends who told me when I was there that he (boyfriend) speaks about me all the time and he's never seen him so happy etc! his best friend has now left the hotel to go back home and they still speak and his best friend tells me that he still speaks great things about me! I am not a religious person but I told my boyfriend I dont believe in premarital sex. I'm not in judgement of those who do at all, it's just something I've wanted to keep for myself (if that makes any sense). I might change my mind on that when I go out to see him again but he was very understanding that I have not and do not plan on sleeping with anyone until marriage. he has openly said he's been in a long distance relationship before and that he has previously had sex with someone which never bothered me at all. (he's 21). I'm not sure where I'm going with his actually but any advice I would be so happy to receive, or if there is any girls dating Turkish guys from Marmaris please message me so we can speak on Facebook or something and hopefully meet up one day. none of my friends really understand it, they're not judgemental, but they just don't get it because they've never been in a relationship like this before so it would be nice to meet and talk to some people that do! Rebecca xx

Hello Everyone I would like to introduce myself,I am 25 years old born and raised in a super small town in Georgia. I am new to this forum and I have recently started dating a Turkish man and some things have been a little on the too good to be true side of things with him and I need to insight and some advice. I've never dated anyone that was from another country before so this is all new to me. And I just want to protect myself if need be. So I will start from the beginning on how my relationship came about with my Turkish boyfriend... I just moved to California from a small southern town in Georgia a month ago (huge difference obviously) and my friend told me about this online dating site to where you can possibly date someone or just be friends with people and since I am new to the area I decided to give it a shot. Granted I have never done the whole online dating scene but again I gave it a shot. So I met this man (which is now my boyfriend who is Turkish) And our first date was simple we met for coffee and talked for like 3 hours. And he seemed normal. And seemed really sweet. By the second date again he was very sweet and a gentlemen, he took me to a romantic restraunt and whooed me so to speak(which I've never had that done for me before) so it was nice. And granted the date went really well. By the third date he told me that he was really happy with me and that he really liked me and all this and I felt the same way which is very true. Now we've only been boyfriend and girlfriend so to speak for 2 weeks and he's already told me that he's in love with me. And telling me that I am the only one for him, and that he can't live without me and thank God he found me, and that he wants to spend forever with me, and wants to marry me. So as I've talked with several of my girlfriends about this they all think that is really sweet of him and they say oh my god he's the perfect man. I on the other hand think that's pretty odd especially since we don't really know one another. So anyways we've been dating for 2 weeks and I've already met most of his family that live here in California. And I have spent the night with him a few times and he's pretty much confessing his undying love for me. And says that he wants to marry me and make LOTS of babies with me. His family seems to like me which is good I mean I am very family oriented myself and I know that if family doesn't like the person you are dating 9 times out of 10 its not going to work. However his parents tell him that I am a beautiful and nice woman and that he needs to hang on to me and hurry up and marry me. He has even said that he wants to take me to Turkey this September. I have never been out of the country so its a little scary for me. But he said that he wants to take me. Now I have googled alot of things about dating turkish men and what are some of the issues American girls have with them and I must say that I am a little freaked out. My boyfriend is very sweet, charming, and makes me really happy and treats me very very well but at the same time I feel like he's rushing things. And I feel like maybe he is too good to be true. But then again I don't want to think negative about him because I know that not all Turkish men are the same. But since we come from two different cultures that kinda concerns me. My family are hardcore southern people who freaked out when I moved out here just because I wanted to experience life. And I am afraid that with our families being so different that it will cause a problem in our relationship. So if ya'll could comment and give me some advice on what you think that I should do or how to approach this whole situation would be great because I am totally clueless.

Hi! I'm Alex, I am Asian and I have a boyfriend from turkey. I met him online and we've been in a relationship for almost a year now. I had no idea that I'd be falling for him. But, he proved of his good intentions. We started exchanging messages for at least a month before he confessed. Since then, we've been in love. He already introduced me to his friends but not yet to his family and he said that he needed time before doing so. I respect that. Neither have I introduced him to mine. I don't want to be blinded about my feelings for him, so I searched about what typical Turks are. I must say, its overwhelming. Coz most of the things I read are good and matched his sooo good characteristics. The others I read are somehow, not so impressing, but I know that its in general. But there's this one that caught my attention and it says something like this: That Turks only go for non-Turk for sex and then leave them after. It made me feel off.. Anyway, he had never been to our country and we've been talking about him coming over anytime soon. I'm feeling so anxious to seeing him. But the thing about what I read online is making me worry. I need advice. THANKS in advance.

Hi, I am in need of advice in planning to date a Turkish boy that attends my school, I am Australian. Now he hasn't had a girlfriend and I am unsure of how to approach the idea of us dating to him, and I want to know if their are any do's and don'ts if we were to date, and any advice you can give me on dating him? I really like him, I want to date him and he thinks he religion would get in the way and I would just annoy him or be a pain. But thing is I don't care if he will be a pain and we can work around his religion. I understand we won't be able to kiss or have premarital sex (That's okay with me, because I am not very interested in that stuff anyway), but should I know of anything else that can't happen? Thanks.

Merhaba everyone I am new to the forums. I am dating a man from Adana and we have been dating a little over a month. He seems very sweet, but he is also very hard-working....which makes talking to him kind of hard, at times (because he is always at work!). Sometimes we have communication problems because he speaks English fairly well, but oftentimes he comes across something that he doesn't know how to say. Unfortunately, I do not know Turkish. I have been trying to learn it but it is a lot more difficult because it is nothing like the languages I already know! (Spanish and English). Anyway, I was wondering about cultural differences. This man has been a real gentleman. He always pays, he always drives, etc. But I feel bad for him paying; when I offer to pay he tells me, "I would feel so bad if you paid!". Also, my birthday passed, and he gave me some pretty elaborate gifts considering the short amount of time we were dating. He gave me a very elaborate Turkish shawl, an evil eye, and a shirt. I'm not used to someone spending that much money on me, and it makes me feel kind of guilty! But I do not want to offend him or make him think that his generosity is not appreciated. However, although I think this guy has good intentions, I worry that he is trying to "own" me by buying me so many things. However, he said that Turkish men are taught to impress a woman like this and that Turkish women expect this from them (I don't know if this is true!! He seems pretty Westernized in some aspects. I was really worried about coming across as an easy, American girl, so I tried to not show a lot of skin in public, but he has traveled a lot outside of Turkey so I think that it doesn't really bother him. He is Muslim, but non-practicing. Anyway, what can I expect in a relationship with a Turkish man? My guy seems very sweet and although he says that all Turkish men are jealous, I have never seen him get jealous or controlling. What do Turkish men want out of a relationship with an American girl? I am very independent and I worry if that is a problem. I just want to understand that cultural differences I can expect so that I can understand them and work through them. Also, he plans on staying in the US to work. He is in the process of getting his PhD.

Sorry - I'll try and keep this brief but I will shortly be returning to Istanbul, where I may be meeting a guy I encountered when I was there earlier this year. Since then he has been bombarding me with text and facebook messages - it's almost been embarrassing. I've heard all the horror stories about Turkish guys, especially the ones that work the resorts, but everything I know about this bloke seems to suggest he is genuine. He has a professional job, lovely flat in Istanbul, has a big loving family - they are Kurds - , doesnt practice Islam (not that I'd care) and EVERYONE seems to adore him - including some old British friends who describe him as one of the family. He has lived in the States, is well travelled, two years younger than me and got divorced a couple of years ago. Thoughts please? I feel like I'm being paranoid but I cant afford another mistake and I'm not in the market for anymore pain and humiliation - I can get plenty of that at home!!

Good day to everyone, I wanted to write to you seeking advice concerning my relationship with a Turkish girl. I am a greek, living abroad, aged 33, and she also lives near my city here, about 40 minutes in distance. I met the girl (26 years old) around 4 months ago at a party and from the first moment it looked as if we connected very well. We spoke from then on every night for the coming months online about everything and she seemed to be genuine interested. In this 4 months we only met 4 times, everytime that I was asking her out, she had some short of excuse. I understood that she is a person that doesn’t want to be pressured, so I started asking her out less frequently and let her take the initiative about when and where we should meet. Two weekends ago she came over to my place, and we spend a really nice weekend together. She was very affectionate and although she left kind of suddenly, it seemed that she was also very interested in me. Apart from the weekend we spend together, when we were chatting, she was always kind of making plans on how we would meet in our respective countries, her coming in Greece, when my holiday was there, and she invited me to visit her in Istanbul, when she would get back. From my part, I was also affectionate, showed her that I care about her, but up to this point. No promises were made on either side, because I knew that it was too soon. My problem started after the weekend we spend together. First day in all her messages she really seemed affectionate, but then as I was asking her to meet again, she declined. And after a few messages, she wrote to me that we shouldn’t be meeting so often, because she doesn’t feel free. I then told her, its ok, we’ll meet whenever you want, and that I wanted to discuss this with her. For one week there was no reply, so I contacted her again (through messenger, she refused to meet me face to face saying she was busy). So I told her that I was confused, and she said that she was sorry and that she knew why I might feel confused. So I told her that I really like her and that I thought that the weekend that we spend together was really nice for me and also all the time that we spend together. She then wrote me back , that she also had a great time with me, that there was nothing wrong from my side, but it was her. She said that she was not good in this kind of realtionships and that she needed to get away, since she realized that I was taking this relationship seriously. Truth be told I care about the girl, that is why I am asking for advice, but apart from showing her that I cared I never pushed her¸ cause I understood that she is the kind of person that doesn’t like to be pushed. So I answered back that its ok, we can take it slow, that I don’t really see where the problem is since we both enjoy each others company. She didn’t answer anything to that and this is how our last conversation ended. My problem is , since I am genuily interested in seeing her again, do I just stop contacting her and wait till she feels like (if) she wants to see me? She seems to be saying the truth since she mentioned twice that she wasn’t feeling free, so maybe ,even if that was not my intention , she clearly thinks that I put pressure on her? Or if I contact her, how do I do it? Thanks in advance for any answers I might get.