Where do I begin...
I went on holiday in the summer and despite not looking met a turkish guy. What attracted me was his intelligence and the fact he was older, in his thirties.
He was managing a restaurant and we messaged everyday and he finished work early and we met every night. At the end of the 2 weeks I returned home.
We have messaged every day since all day every day. We also video chat most days and I am flying back to meet him in January.
My problem is I think I am ruining it as I am so distrustful . He says that he is single but I question him constantly. When we met he had rings on both hands, not wedding rings just single and before I went home he took one from his left hand and put it on mine, but then said he would get another ring to replace it. He said he didn't want people asking if he was married or not.
He has been nothing but attentive and has asked me to move to Turkey to be with him, also said he wants to marry me but will leave it up to me to say when I'm ready.
He paid for everything when I was with him and won't let me pay for anything when I go over in January hotel etc. I have offered him money and he refused saying men don't take money from women. He is also not interested in a visa. He knows I want to live in Turkey in 5 years or so.
He lives with his sister and husband and kids but I don't believe him. I just suspect constantly and I know this is wearing him down.
He was meant to work in resort until end of October but went home day after I left as he said he couldn't bear to be there without me. He gave me his address to write to him which I do regularly.
He always talks from his room and has shown me round house and his sister's room etc. My concerns are these could a man get to 30 odd without being married. He said his parents are liberal and not traditional and knew he wanted to study. Is it normal to live with his married sister. Again he said he always lived there as close to city.
He has a job working 14 hour days and is also studying for a masters degree so now he has less time to talk. It's making me so suspicious . I think I have heard so many bad stories I have tarred them all with same brush.
I know he will run out of patience with me and to be honest I really don't know what he gets out of it. He is so excited about showing me his town and all his favourite places. I can only go for 4 days due to work commitments but I am causing problems because he isn't going to introduce me to his family.
He said he wants to be alone with me and not waste time but when I come back longer he will. He said he's not a teenager and doesn't need approval.
I feel I am Too old to be carrying on like this but am determined I'm not going to be made a fool of. I really do like him and love it when we are together or talking on video. I just find so many things strange and don't know if cultural differences or what. Now he says he has exams coming up and needs to talk less for next few weeks as he has to study, you can imagine what I'm thinking lol
Any guidance or how to shut off a suspicious mind gracefully received.