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debbieanbatu

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Everything posted by debbieanbatu

  1. Hi... Sorry I've not been on for a while, to be honest I've just been trying to move on with things and just forget about my Husband threatening to Divorce me from Turkey, but his Girlfriend seams to have other ideas... I've received a message today where she's boasting about my Husbands Divorce from me becoming final as of Tomorrow (Monday 14th October) I have not received any Divorce papers from Turkey, and it seems, if it is true that he's managed to Divorce me without my consent, and without my knowledge... he certainly has had no grounds to Divorce me on so what ever has been entered into any Divorce papers will be all lies... because I have not received any Divorce petition from Turkey I have not been able to see what he's supposed to have Divorced me on.... but anything I would NOT have given my consent.. I've explained the Turkish Divorce laws to his girlfriend and said that any Divorce without my consent would not be legal as far as I'm concerned, I told her I have not received any Divorce petition to my UK address.... I also told her that UK don't recognise a Turkish Divorce and as such I still would be married to him under Uk law, which means he is not free to marry another UK Citizen (her) only that he can marry another Turkish woman... She's answered saying that I'm wrong in my knowledge of Turkish divorce (but not in so nice words that I have just written) and been boasting that she will be marrying my Husband on New Years Eve this yr.... and will then happily send me all the photo's.. If any Lawyer can advise please... Is there anyway I can check in Turkey that my Husband has Divorced me without my consent....
  2. Hello... I'm hoping one of our Turkish Attorney members can help me here with some advice... but any advise is welcome I married my Turkish Husband in Turkey 2004... we moved to UK 2006 and the marriage was recognised here...we have lived together in both Turkey and the Uk throughout our marriage.. We have recently separated Dec 2012 and I withdrew my sponsorship of his Limited to remain visa Feb 2013 (I never applied for Indefinite visa for my Husband) but also his visa expired anyway 9th March 20013.. so he was living here after this time illegally with his new English girlfriend... I reported him to Immigration and he was aware they were looking for him so he has now returned back to Turkey 6th June 2013 with his new girlfriend.. He is trying to Divorce me from Turkey and I have been sent a message from his girlfriend to say,, they have seen a solicitor in Bodrum and a date has been set for the Divorce, if I don't attend the court on this day then they make another date and if I don't attend the second date then the marriage will be dissolved there and then.. I have not received any paperwork from my Husband solicitor in Bodrum (if it even true they have seen one) for me to give or not give my consent to the marriage.... I have advised my Husband's new girlfriend that on no account will the marriage be dissolved even if I don't attend the hearing because I do not give my consent... I advised my Husband has absolutely no grounds to Divorce me on and I would not consent to any of his lies... where as I have a list as long as your arm for me to Divorce my Husband on... My concern here is that I have been told that my Husband was trying to start a Divorce in an illegal way.. by asking his girlfriend to act as me (His wife) and to forge my signature to make Divorce... I can not for one minute think that the court would accept any Divorce petition without our Marriage book (which I have here in the UK) and a copy of my passport .... I am also concerned that if I was to give permission to make Divorce in Turkey that here in the UK I am still legally married and as such can not re-marry..... it's my understanding that UK law does not recognise a Turkish Divorce.. so I would not be able to register the Divorce here... I am aware though that if I was to Divorce here in the UK first, my Husband can then take the Decree absolute, have it translated and notarized and then register the UK Divorce in Turkey, and this is a lot less complicated... I want to make the Divorce in my best interest and not make any favour for my Husband so he can then re-marry his new girlfriend so she can then apply for new visa to come back to UK... One major problem I have is the costs incurred from starting a Divorce here in the Uk.. I have no money and have been left with at least £8,000 debt which was incurred during the start of our marriage when we were first living in Turkey together... Can someone please advise my best route...
  3. Yes me too many congrats to you both......... I cant think of anyone who deserves it more than you sue you have been a tower of strength and determination through your illness....... hes a lucky guy...... and your a lucky girl...
  4. Hi IngalillWelcome to the forumI cant comment on the way your marriage was conducted and that you were never asked about whether you wanted to take your Husbands name after marriage as thats what is usually done in the Uk and when I married my Turkish Hubby here in Turkey......... We had to sign our names (mine was previous surname) and on the marriage book it states my birth surname and my past married surname and my new surname so that when using the book to register changes like on passport or driving license etc they can see the link from my past surnames to this one.... I would have thought you would also have to have the change of names on your marriage certificate to prove why you have changed your surname, like I say when using the certificate to change your surname (which the authority's ask for your marriage certificate when you advise your name was changed through marriage) on important papers like the Bank account wanted to see my marriage certificate because it shows why my name was changed and that it was changed legaly... How you would go about changing your name now you are married I'm sorry I have no idea.... what about getting in touch with the registrar office you were married at to ask what the procedure is.....and why you were never even asked about name change.....
  5. Great news everything went so well.....
  6. Hi ChopsThats the bit I'm not sure how to go about........ I'm guessing but you would probably need to submit your translated papers via a solicitor.... but dont quote me.. Can you not send Mrs Lawyer a PM from this forum....ask how how you go about getting the divorce recognized here in turkey and that you have all the papers translated ready....sorry I cant be more help.... trouble is I dont know anyone who has been through this process...
  7. Hi Chops What Siren said is correct İF your b/f and his first wife had not initiated a Divorce in the Uk first.....he would have opened a case here in Turkey, served the papers to his ex in Uk and taken it from there....... In your case because they Divorced over 2yrs ago in the Uk ..... he now can do as sunnys post said from Mrs Lawyer You may get your divorce decree recognized here in Turkey. In other words, you do not need to open a divorce case in Turkey. I really could not understand why you started an action here. He has already divorced! 'Recognition of a decision given by an English court related to marriage and divorce can be registered in Turkey. By the principals of
  8. Cant imagine why you didn't inquire about boob jobs cukur. .... I'll send Karyn a pm as her link is about cosmetic dentistry.........something else I would like to have done.... Thanks guys....
  9. oh Cukur how wonderful for you.... yes you must be really excited but at the same time slightly nervous, anyone would be..... but the outcome .... it never ceases to amaze me what can be done yr after yr regards medical treatments.. Just think in a couple weeks you will open your eyes and be able to see everything clearly without having to reach for your glasses.... technology ehSadly for a few yrs now my eyes have deteriorated for reading.... its such a pain having to reach for my glasses before I can read the instructions on the pkt.... Just out of curiosty... does the Hospital at Antalya do plastic Surgery.... I'm thinking of a possible boob lift and tummy tuck........ Why will I possibly do it.... because I can
  10. ohhh Cukur I'm drooling..... it looks lovely, I miss scones with fresh cream and jam....they were also my Hubby's favorite sweet pastry back in UK.... Your so lucky to have real milk and so able to make real fresh cream........ Yes I too wish I lived nearer, mind you ....dont think you'd appreciate it if I did, you'd never have any buns and cakes left and the tea pot would be on constantly.... I made some Victoria Scones a couple of weeks ago, I offered one to Hubby and said they taste just like the scones we used to get in UK but sorry no cream or jam.......... he bloody refused cos there was no cream and jam.... I"ve bought some stuff as I"m going to attempt making a cheese cake............. I have a brilliant Recipe that never fails but it contains carnation Milk (which you cant get here) so this is a new one for me to try.... I'll let you know how it goes...........scoobydoo that recipe looks nice..... I like oat biscuit and coconut so I should really like these.... I'll get some stuff then attempt to make them... Wish I had some of curkur's fresh cream
  11. I really don't understand what their trying to achieve here.... Not only are the cars twice as much just about as in the UK but now you have the added expense of the Resident permit and a Turkish driving licence.... this is going to cause a lot of stress for people now having to do all the running around trying to sort both out.... Turks who live in UK don't need a permanent visa or an English driving license to own a car... so why are we being penalized for everything because we just want to live here.... I've no doubt some people wont bother with cars now ..... so thats a loss to the country as not so many cars will be bought... why do they always cut their nose's off to spite their faces..... By the way do you know if it applies to scooters/Motorbikes .....
  12. Whiterose...... don't think of it like that 'an insult to our wedding' ....... its paperwork thats all... means to an end... When I married the first time in UK.... my Husband had been married before but I wanted to marry in Church.... in UK they don't (or didn't) allow divorc
  13. I really feel for you and I'm sorry I cant help with your situation.... But has for getting married again here in Turkey ........ would you actually be able to do that........ are you not already married...... wouldn't that be bigamy (although your marrying the same woman) if you are allowed to marry in Turkey........ then that clearly says your marriage is not legal at all........ Honestly if thats the case.... and you can marry in Turkey... I think that would be the easiest option and quickest... its a means to an end....
  14. Hi Jasmine I found this info from the UKBA web site, I haven't copied everything but I have given you the link.... you should read the info as it tells you what the criteria is for to be able to apply... http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/partners...scivilpartners/ If you are currently outside the UK If you are subject to immigration control and you are married to or in a civil partnership with a British citizen or person who is settled here, you can apply for permission to come to the UK in this category. Your husband, wife or civil partner must be at least 21 years old (or 18 years old if you or they are a serving member of HM Forces), and must be: ■currently living and settled in the UK; or ■returning to the UK with you to live here permanently. As you can see, the bit I highlighted does state either UK citizen OR settled in UK (which you are) you along with everyone else in this situation will have to show your settled, show your rent or mortgage agreement and also provide enough financial evidence to prove you can support both your self and your Husband if he were to be granted the visa...
  15. Hi Sue..... I'm afraid with Turkey not being part of EU things are much different.... for him to even have a dutch passport he must first become Dutch Citizen..... after which time he would probably be able to use his dutch passport to gain entry into UK (but I'm not 100% sure on this as he first Turkish Citizen) Hi Jasmin.... I too cannot really help regarding getting your Husband (when you are legally married) a 2 year settlement visa for UK.... as like you say although you have been living in the UK for past 10yr you are still Dutch Citizen...... if you don't have UK passport you are not UK citizen..... so maybe the rules are different.... hopefully sirin will come along and be able to help....
  16. Hi All...... I've just seen this on another forum and as I havnt seen or heard anything from anyone I was wondering if anyone here had heard anything about the new rule....or if there is a new rule... I wondered if the person at the notary Yetiş had got the 'having to have Residency Visa' the wrong way round..... like we know we need the Foreign ID number from our res visa to buy any vehicle, was they confused about this and thought it was also to sell a vehicle..... Nothing ceases to amaze me here, how the hell are you supposed to get anything done right when everyone you speak to gives a differant answer, its like no one knows what their doing......... You can ask 2 policemen the same question here and get 3 differant answers.... Take a look at the info... New laws are impacting on foreigners in Fethiye and other areas of Turkey who want to sell their cars or motorbikes. Last week, Fethiye businessman and Rotary Club Chairman Hakan Yetiş decided to buy a motor scooter from a foreigner. The process as anyone who has done this will know, involves a trip to the tax office to ensure that there are no debts outstanding followed by a visit to a notary who will complete the paperwork and register the transaction. On arriving at the notary Yetiş and the vendor were told that the sale could not proceed because the foreign vendor had only a tourist visa and no residency permit or Turkish Identity number. When asked what they proposed to do about this the foreigners (who do not wish to be named) said it was
  17. Hi scoobydooYou may be able to get the car registered in both names as you have a residence visa so should be able to obtain a Foreign ID number (I had an out of date res visa but still was able to obtain a Foreigners ID number using the residency visa book number) check out this web site to get your Foreigners ID number ...... http://tckimlik.nvi.gov.tr/Web/ForeignQuer...tityNumber.aspxDo ask at the notor though.... if you can register in both names you will have to have a Translator present for your side of things and also have your passport Translated... for both I was quoted 140TL plus the fee for changing the car into your names at least 35TL may be more for two names I'm not sure........
  18. ohh dear what a shame you had to make two........... ......... They look lovely as ever and you could always freeze one for later..... I like how you took your photo with your Turkish tea pot at the side..... does that mean were invited then.....
  19. Hi loopylooI'm afraid if you want to marry another Turkish man then you will have to divorce in Turkey also, your marriage will still be recognised in Turkey........it makes sence to divorce in Turkey so as to leave your ex Husband free to also marry again..... you can give power of attorney to a solicitor in Turkey (one that speaks very good English) this saves you coming over... Having said.... even if you were divorced in Turkey you couldn't marry your b/f in the UK anyway because he resides there only on a student visa.... as far as I'm aware, this is my understanding... When you apply to get married in the Uk they usually ask to see your passports, they should even ask to see yours to clarify you are a UK citizen... when they see your b/f student visa they would question his ability to marry in UK..check out the UK Boarder web site it as all the info you should need to answer your question.... http://www.bia.homeoffice.gov.uk/while-in-...ip/eligibility/
  20. Cheers Sue....next time I have some that look like there just turning I'll put them in the freezer and keep for baking etc...... Mind you I said to Hubby yesterday that I wasnt going to do any more baking (well not for a while) as I was eating most of the cakes etc and at this rate I would be 15 stone by Xmas.... So I've now decided to make more traditional Turkish foods... just been to market and bought some veg and few bits from supermarket and I am making spinach with rice (Pirin
  21. Hi Sue.... and thanks for the tip, I never knew you could freeze bananas....after defrosting though can you eat them as normal or are they only good for baking or smoothies... scoobydoo...... your cake look scrummy, and a good tip adding the cinnamon.... glad it turned out ok adding the sunflower oil..... yes I found mine to be very Moorish.... Cukur.......... I agree with scoobydoo I think adding olive oil will be too heavy and would probably alter the taste... I've also made two lots of Potato Pogaca ............... and they were lovely... gave some to the security guards here.. they loved them.. http://www.giverecipe.com/fluffy-pogaca.html
  22. Come on Cukur get your mixing bowl out.... .... I love bananas but find I'm throwing more and more away as they dont seem to keep the same here..... so today before I was about to throw 3 very ripe ones away I thought.... hang on.... lets search the web for a banana cake recipe..... Came across this recipe- http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/7380/banana-cake.... it took all of about 5-7mins to prepare (my kind of recipe) it took me longer to wash up after........ and it tastes great... I cant take a photo cos Hubbys got the camera phone on him at work...... and I've had 3 pieces so far so they may not be any left later.... I thought it would be nice with some custard......... ahhhhhhh Bananas & custard......... I've also made some Orange Marmalade (first time ever) and it tastes great.... although it was a lot of messing around preparing and cooking.... Trouble is.... if I carry on at this rate I'm going to be putting a little bit of weight on ...
  23. debbieanbatu

    Ex Wife !

    While I totaly agree that you should be able to enjoy life .... Correct me if I'm wrong but reading your quote above.... I can only presume that you are not going to talk with your husband, but instead are going to brush all your feeling of doubt and jealousy under the carpet and try putting it all to the back of your mind..... where it will no doubt fester..... be careful of doing this... without discussing with your Hubby why your so jealous and paranoid you risk these doubts turning even more sour and then later regretting that you didn't talk openly with hubby about everything... Sounds like you want to forget everything try and move on... 'and what will be will be' ...... in my experience and opinion this never works.... problems such as these need to be discussed and sorted before they get worse...... what happens the next time he wants to go back to Turkey to visit the family, how are you going to be feeling while hes gone...... Just out of curiosity have you ever gone to visit the family with him... and if not...why.......maybe you both going there together from now on will be the only way to put your mind at rest... I really wish you all the best and hope you can sort all your fears out...... I just think to bury your head in the sand is not the way....
  24. I live in Bodrum Centre with my Turkish Husband, we moved back here Xmas time 2009 so have been back 5m.... when we were first married 6yrs ago I moved over here to live with hubby and we stayed in Gumbet for just about 2yrs before moving over to UK, it was a very difficult time for me and the biggest factor was trying to survive on Turkish wages, they just never pay enough to live moderately comfortable, we were always on the breadline, after nearly two years I couldn't stand it any longer and we moved to UK. But Hubby never really settled there and work has always been difficult to obtain there (same as here really) so we decided to come back and try again, with one massive factor. I sold my UK home and the equity I took from it, not that much I may add and certainly not enough to buy another house here, but enough to bank and allow the monthly interest to pay our rent. Without it we could never have come back. Can I ask have you ever lived here in Turkey before? I ask this because I always think its a good idea to rent somewhere first for at least a year before deciding to buy to get a feel for the place and to decide if this is really where you want to live, or can afford to live. It's so different to just spending a few weeks at a time holidaying here. Also I don't know what your hubby's work would be here in Bodrum but jobs are very scarce and difficult to find. Long term work is near impossible to obtain as Bodrum is mainly a tourist place, having said that I prefer to live here in Bodrum to Gumbet, when the season ends end October, Gumbet becomes like a ghost town, everything closes so you can soon become isolated and very lonely, at least Bodrum keeps a few people here through the winter. After moving back here we soon realised how prices for everything have shot up and continue to do so, house prices, rent, electric, water, gas, food, petrol (more expensive than UK) you name it and you'll be surprised at the price increase. So again renting gives you time to find long term work and decide if you can afford to live here. Whatever money you manage to save you can invest in a Turkish bank and use the monthly interest to pay your rent like I do. That way you still have your lump sum intact when and if you decide to buy.
  25. debbieanbatu

    Ex Wife !

    Hi Mrsb... While I dont want to add anymore doubt to your mind, I can say I understand why you are continually doubting him..... I am not here to judge you or him on his illegal entry (twice) into UK... but it would offer me some doubt as to his true intentions (only because of everything else you have told us) .... he now has been lucky enough to have met and married you and that you have been able to provide legal entry for him to stay in a country he so obvously wishes to stay in.... after all he has family in UK and no doubt a job...... I would have some doubts based on everything else about his true intentions for marrying... thats just my opinion and what I would personally be thinking... The telephone call where he quickly hung up when you questioned the Ex being there..... again I would be very suspicious and would be finding it difficult to believe him.... yes you hear lots of stories where the man is still married but will deny it till hell freezes over that he doesnt love her and they are not married anymore (whether legally divorced or just in the eyes of Allah) but I would be thinking does he have some long term plan........ you only have to read the other thread on here about the woman who's been clearly conned by her Hubby for a visa into Canada and the prospect of earning lots of money to keep sending back to his family to see it happens.... Do you have proof that he is Divorced.... you say they had Religious ceremony then it was made formal like your own... but if he was married legally and not just had an Imam wedding then he would have had to divorced the same as we would here.... My main concern would be WHY would his brother and wife lie to you about his Ex still living in the family home back in Turkey, WHY would they say he lies to you if it were not true ...........what could they possibly gain out of lying to you.... Nothing ..... but your Hubby has lots to gain by keeping you on his side and wanting you to believe him.... and cutting ties with his brother is one way to keep you on his side and hopefully have you believe him over them.... İf the Ex does still live in the family home (much to his regret) I can only think that she is still welcome there because of the child they share. and that his parents want her there so they can share in the life of their grandchild..... but most woman I have heard about wouldnt want to stay in the Husband's family home after a divorce if they still had parents of their own to go to.... unless all parties concerned feel her living there keeps some honor between the families..... I think its probably this talk from the Brother & Sister-in-law that has really made you questions whether what he is telling you is the truth....... You really need to sit down and put all your cards on the table.... explain to him why you doubt him.... after all his own family say he is a lier... you may be scared of aproaching the subject as you may be scared of the outcome.... but you really need to talk about everything and explain your constant worries to him..... if you dont sort it out sooner or later your marriage will break down anyway.... and you will find yourself trying to move on alone..... but it may not have been neccesery if you had been able to talk about it..... Good Luck
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